If you must fight, fight without reservation.
If you must act, act with determination,
and if you must love, love unconditionally.
For in this life there is no reward for half measures.
i will be in airport at 1 o'clock WIB. addressing to Kuala lumpur city. as i mentioned before i will be in Malaysia. my plan was to celebrate the Chrismas eve there, was canceled. but still i will be there in Malaysia for vacation and also to Singapore for New year eve. so i wont do posting in this blog until new year 1 January.
"forgive us our traspasses as we forgive those who traspassed against us. give us this day our daily bread"
In celo et in Tera, fiat voluntas tua, GLORIA! ESPIRITUI SANCTO
Merry Christmas everyone. i'm very busy today for the preparation on this special day. i shall go to the Kathedral in my place for the Misa (prayer)
i and my friends rico, Indra, and jonathan are comming with me to celebrate this christmas in church[Kathedral]. including my bf, he comes here yesterday to join the Christmas pray in Kathedral with me and my friends.
we are all in the same way of lifestyle. rico also got a bf. but the rests is single. we known indra and jonathan in kathedral. and rico is my classmate in high school. but ever since we were graduated from high school, we drifted apart. and becoz i've got a job that make me be faraway from my hometown, so i lose all their track.
only this year i call him and also indra and jonathan. to join the christmas event in kathedral. this day only for christmas.
thanks Jesus Christ for ur kindness, for your love to us of these favors such as healthy, prosperous and our job this year goes well eventually. and hope all bless also be yours.
"God loves us. God love us with no conditions. we are all precious in His Eyes" Glory Divine! Halleluya!
i'm sorry if you find in my posting that some videos are inactivated. 'coz such a video from ning network will close all the adult gay websites. for example longisbetter is no longer exist. and in january 2009, for more network of ning.com will shut down. www.queerclique.com
Gay couple won't let Proposition 8 steal their dream
"Two men who moved from Ohio to California to marry continue to protest the measure's passage" By Alexandra Zavis (L.A.Times) December 21, 2008
Fearing taunts and disapproval, they kept their love hidden for nearly two years. But with the Nov. 4 election looming, Christopher Lewis and Cody Horton resolved to take a leap of faith.
Following in the footsteps of generations of adventurers and romantics, the shy young couple from Ohio announced they were heading west to marry and begin a new life in California. They put on dark suits and exchanged vows on an unseasonably balmy afternoon in late October, before family, friends and the wide Pacific Ocean.
Wanting to give back to the state that recognized his union, Lewis took a job as a physician's assistant at a community health center in Tehachapi, southeast of Bakersfield, caring for migrant farm workers. But by the time they had packed up their apartment in Ohio and returned to California, voters had approved a change to the state Constitution that put their marriage in doubt.
Before they moved here, the self-effacing couple had never even seen a demonstration, much less protested themselves. But two days after the election, they drove two hours into Los Angeles and nervously joined the throngs marching in protest against Proposition 8. The next night, they were back on the streets in Long Beach. The night after, in Silver Lake, then Westwood and downtown L.A.
"It just hurt so bad; it's all we could think of doing," Lewis said. "It's all we have left."
They are pessimistic that the California Supreme Court will overturn the ban, despite the high-profile appeals by top politicians, including state Atty. Gen. Jerry Brown.
"I did send a wedding picture to the chief justice and wrote a note on the back of it asking him to share it," Lewis said. "Hopefully, if they see enough faces, they will realize that their decisions make a huge difference."
Lewis, 24, and Horton, 20, found each other online during one lonely Christmas vacation in 2006. Horton was in his last year of high school in Middletown, Ohio. Lewis was studying to become a physician's assistant at Kettering College of Medical Arts, a Seventh-day Adventist school in nearby Dayton.
"It was awful," Lewis said. "We had to take religion classes, and they teach being gay is wrong."
He started searching MySpace pages for anyone listing themselves as gay in the Dayton area. A song posted on Horton's page (Say Anything's "Slowly, Through a Vector") caught Lewis' attention, and he left Horton a message. They chatted online, then agreed to meet at a club. Later, they went to the home of Horton's grandmother, who was out of town. They put on a movie, and Horton put his head on Lewis' shoulder.
It felt right, Lewis said. "We felt like we fit in each other's arms."
At first they met in hotel rooms. "Where else could we go to hug or hold hands?" Lewis said.
After Horton graduated from high school, they found jobs so they could afford an apartment together. But they continued to hide their relationship from most people. More than once, passing motorists shouted abusive comments as they walked down the street together. Some real estate agents refused to show them single-bedroom apartments.
Earlier this year, Lewis bought the nicest ring he could afford -- white gold with three tiny diamonds -- drove Horton to a park and proposed. They hugged and cried. But they could not make the union official.
The only state at the time that performed same-sex marriages was Massachusetts, which requires a couple's home state to recognize such unions. But in May, the California Supreme Court ruled that it was unconstitutional to ban same-sex marriage, a decision that did not have the same limits as Massachusetts' law.
Lewis and Horton, thinking there was no rush, began considering a California wedding. In September, realizing that Proposition 8 might pass, they went online to book a Long Beach restaurant and find an officiant.
Horton's father did not realize his son was gay until the invitation arrived. Horton's stepmother tried to persuade him to attend the ceremony; she said he walked away and wouldn't look at the card. He later apologized to Horton for missing the big day and awkwardly wished his son well.
Lewis has been estranged from his father for years and did not bother to invite him. But both mothers and Horton's grandmother flew to California for the Oct. 26 wedding.
The day itself passed in a blur. But leading up to it, the thought of standing on a public beach, in front of people they had lied to for years, filled them with dread. For days, they had practiced the perfect wedding kiss: long enough for photos, but not too sloppy. In the end, they managed only a quick peck. Yet for all the awkwardness, it was a day they treasure.
"In a lifetime we both spent with no support for any of our relationships . . . it is so great to stand up in front of your friends and family, the state of California and the Pacific Ocean, and have somebody recognize it, appreciate it and celebrate it," Lewis said. "That's a huge deal for people like us."
Back in Ohio they packed up and began the drive west. The first four days were like a honeymoon. But Nov. 4 found them at a hotel in Flagstaff, Ariz., watching election returns. Lewis slept fitfully, waking up twice to check on Proposition 8. By 7 a.m., it was clear it had passed. "It was the end of our last hope," Lewis said.
Horton was asleep, so Lewis slipped into the bathroom to cry. He then called his mother from the car.
"They just took away my marriage," he wept. His mother's advice was to fight.
They abandoned plans to visit the Grand Canyon and drove straight to Tehachapi, a rural community known for its apple orchards, wind turbines and maximum security prison. They pulled into a bleak apartment complex and collected their keys.
The magnitude of what they had done fully set in only when they got their Internet connected and looked up how their neighbors in Kern County had voted. Just over 75% voted in favor of Proposition 8.
"It is not an accepting environment," Lewis said.
They spent the night under a comforter on the oatmeal-colored carpet. The next day, they spread sheets of yellow cardboard on the floor and started writing: "Marriage license: $70. Wedding ceremony: $1,000. Plane tickets for family and friends: $2,700. Our wedding: priceless."
"It's liberating to take everything you feel every day and put it on a poster," Horton said, "and hold it up and say, 'I don't care who sees it.' "
Unthinkable even a few months ago, Lewis now has organized a protest himself.
When he found out that the American Academy of Physician Assistants, a professional association to which he belongs, planned to hold its annual conference at San Diego hotels owned by the Manchester Financial Group -- which donated $125,000 to help pass Proposition 8 -- he sent letters to senior officials at the academy, asking them to reconsider, and posted messages on Internet forums, urging colleagues to do the same.
All he could think of was how much money the conference would bring the hotels.
"It just kind of pushed me over the edge," he said. "Somebody has to put their neck on the line, and I was willing to do it, I guess, this time."
How to Trust Your Trust "A quiet confidence. An inner certainty. A knowing deep within that all is well even though it may not appear so on the outside. Trust demands that we let go of fears, worry, doubt and despair which drag us down. Trust lifts us up to higher elevations where we see the bigger picture in life and know that things are happening for a reason in their own time and for our own benefit, if only we will believe this and not interfere"
When we settle into a space of trust we access our inner guidance system; we know what to do, when to do it and when to wait. We know that the ideal people and circumstances will serendipitously manifest into our lives. We may not trust everyone we meet or every situation we come across, but we trust our inner knowing. We listen to our intuitive voice that rests in stillness, guiding us to our highest path. When we let our small self or ego mind run the show we override our inner knowing. We don't trust it. It's as if we're saying to the Universe: I know how to manage the earth, the sun, and all the planets in the cosmos.
We forget that there is a universal intelligence, a creator, source or whatever you call that divine essence guiding everything from the plants to the planets, including us, if we will allow ourselves to trust. It's a matter of releasing resistance and letting the stream of life flow through us.
Insights * On a scale of one to ten, with ten being high, what would you rate your current level of trust (in terms of trusting how your life will unfold)?
* What supports you to tune into your inner knowing, and to increase your level of trust?
* What gets in the way of you accessing your inner knowing and being more trusting?
Inspiration * Close your eyes and become fully present and centered by brining all of your awareness into the center of your head, a few inches back from your forehead. Rest in this place until you sense an inner stillness and expansiveness. From this centered space, tune into your essence of trust. Feel the energy of it and allow it to expand, filling your whole body. Release any resistance or holding on sensations and allow the trusting feeling to blanket you in safety.
* Each and every day, set your intention to increase your levels of inner trust by taking time to be still and feel it. Know that you don't have to control every aspect of your life; the divine essence of the universe is there to guide and take care of you. When you forget this, ask yourself what supports the earth and the other planets to orbit perfectly? What allows the plants to grow and blossom?
* The next time you have a difficult decision to make or you're concerned about the future, rather than getting lost in worry or doubt, or immediately following the lead of your practical, logical mind, take a moment to find stillness, access your inner trust, and then choose the best path.
"As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live." Goethe
Michelle Duggar celebrates Mother’s Day in a much bigger way than any of us mom’s could imagine. She has announced baby eighteen is on the way. The 41-year old mom [2008], says she’s thrilled the new addition will join the seven sisters and 10 brothers. For Mother’s Day, the kids got together to get mom some pearls with matching pearl earrings. Dad got her a ring.“We’re enjoying them so much and we would love more, so the lord has seen fit to give us another one and we’re just thankful,” Duggar said. At 20, the oldest Duggar child is Josh. Jennifer is the youngest at 9-months. All the children’s names start with the letter “J” and all are home-schooled.
This is a special image of a big family ever in the world. may be at ancient time, in Main land China. or even in my country, in the country side. there still many family which has many children. but in big cities of most countries in the world they dont want it, included my place Bandung City, and Jakarta - The capital. 'coz it spends much money. But personally, if i could, if i can having marriage with a girl someday. i would also have many children, but not that much. i could be so very stress of taking care children.
but the most stress in family must be my wife. you know why? it is because she will wonder, wonder of: "why my sons love to see penis?" ("of course like me" i have to proudly say it to myself) hahaha, just kidding. i dont know if i can have sex with woman or not? i just dont have desire with woman even if there is a naked woman infront of me. well, ok, let's check out for more pics on this family by click in here
Declaration.
OMG! this is the fearest thing ever in my life.
i dont know what's my parents' respond if i said
"mom, dad. i'm a gay. i love my boyfriend, and i'm gonna married with him"
what to expect of doing this?
being discriminated from family?
nope, i dont think it is necesarry.
in my life i just live my life
i just do my best of what i will pass through.
and in this movie below, i feel so sorry for that girl.
